Do you ever have a day that just makes you feel like you suck at life? Yeah, that was yesterday. Nothing huge or terrible happened, but a series of little things just beat down my confidence and put me in a bit of a funk. I forgot to feed Nate breakfast before I dropped him off at school and had to call and ask them to give him part of his lunch to eat in the morning. I was so embarrassed having to call and tell them I forgot to feed my child. Who does that? I won't bore you with the rest of my crappy day but it ended at 11pm with me attempting to finish a nap mat for Nate and accidentally sewing the bias tape to the edge of the whole thing but forgetting to add the blanket. I cursed loudly as I began to rip 5 feet of seam apart and then heard Nate crying. I thought I had woken him up but, it turns out, I had forgotten to put the kid's diaper on before bed and he woke up because he had peed. He was so upset like it was his fault. I comforted him, changed his clothes and bedding, and snuggled him until he fell asleep. I gave up on the day at that point and just went to bed.
Do you ever feel like your tiny failures as a mother add up to epic disappointments? I know I do. I will try to make today a better day. I will try to keep my patience in check when I am feeling beat down. I will try not to be so hard on myself. I will be better. They deserve it.